Monday, April 6, 2015

2 months, T-Shirts, and Birth Mother Love

It's been a while since I posted an actual blog post. I've had all the intentions of writing, and just haven't got there yet. So, here's some updates and a post!

Update 1 - We raised around $500 by selling t-shirts! You guys rock! I am so in awe of how our friends and family step up to support us! $500 may not seem like much considering our next payment is $15,000, BUT that is $500 less in debt that we will need to go, and $500 that I won't have to pay on my own. That is AMAZING. We have raised a little over $1,000 since we started and we are excited to see God provide the rest in ways only He can. Philippians 4:19 - And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from His glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus. 
- IF YOU BOUGHT A SHIRT -please take a picture of you wearing it and send it to us!!!

Update 2- As of March 28 we have been "officially" waiting for 2 months. That means that our profile has been available to show to birth mothers for 2 months. I hate saying that we have been waiting for 2 months. Really, we have been in the adoption process since June and that means we have really been waiting for around 10 months. The wait sucks and is really hard. It does help to know that we will wait the exact right amount of time to be sure we are placed with the exact right baby and exact right birth mother, but it doesn't make the waiting any easier.

2 months "officially" waiting - March 28, 2015

  Lately I've been thinking about our birth mother a lot. I've also been aware of how many people have misconceptions of birth mothers and their relationship with their child. I want you to know that we love and respect our birth mother already - without even knowing her. She may be difficult to get along with, or easy, she may be radically different from us or have things in common, she may be older than us, or younger than us, she may be a teenager or from a rough background, or she may be a professional. No matter what the situation I can confidently say that we LOVE our birth mother. And this is not a we love her because we have to because she's our child's mother or because we should love everybody, we genuinely care for and love her. I'm sure we will have disagreements and will butt heads at times, but that doesn't change the fact that we love her. She is already part of our family and always will be, no matter how open our adoption is. She will always be talked about, mentioned, and discussed with love and respect. She is our child's mother in a way that I can never be, just like I will be his or her mother in a way the birth mom never will be. She is an integral part of our family already. It is crazy to think that we love her and we don't even know her or anything about her. But, God gives us that ability. We love because He first loved us (1 John 4:19). He gave us the ability to love others through His unconditional love for us. He made the ultimate sacrifice for us to be able to live with Him for eternity. Our birth mother is also making a sacrifice in allowing us to raise her child, and we cannot respond to that sacrifice with anything but love.
  Many people have preconceived ideas about who birth mothers are. Most people think birth mother and they think "teen mom." But, we learned that the average age of a birth mother is 25, and that the younger a mom, the more likely she is to parent the baby herself. Birth mothers also don't "give their baby up for adoption," they make an adoption plan. They are not giving up on their baby, they are actively making a plan to do what they feel is best for their child. They are not selfish, but selfless. It is not easy to make an adoption plan for a child you give birth to, it is a selfless act of love for that child. The birth mother will not try to come and take her child back (it is not like a Lifetime movie), she knew what she was doing when she decided to make an adoption plan for her baby.
  So, just remember when you are talking to a birth mother or someone adopting that the birth mother is part of the adoptive family and she deserves to be treated with love and respect, just like her baby.

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